Weakness Prevails

[Nepenthe]

Another one that's quite old.



I'm a derelict with intellect
Anemic and frail
Dependent on the habits that falsely do me well
No matter what path I take
No matter what choices I make
All of my deeds are destined to fail

I would say to take me home if I knew where I belonged
I'd desire back my strength as if I were ever strong
But still there strains that strange emotion
Whether a gift or a punishment
Negativity claims my devotion

Tempted by temporary solutions to a permanent problem
That's all I can succumb to when I cannot overcome
For there is no cure here
Only self infliction and fear
Of the life I cease to ever behold
Rifling through the traffic of this rough yet delicate woeful road

If it's not one thing it sure will be another
So to drown the pain I'll down another
In imaginary bliss I'll always wallow
When every poison's downed and swallowed
Attempt to deny while I cry out the silent wails
Each and everyday my weakness prevails

I would rid myself of sickness had it not harbored in my head
The sickness only settles when I'm binging, when I'm bled
Just a slave to these estranged emotions
Not a lingering lust for life
Each damn day just drifting through the motions

To live the lies of a lifeless, lethargic, self loathing loser
To balance on the blades a bleeder or a boozer
It's as if I were castrated
Disgusted, depressed and downright frustrated
By the searing pain passing as an oncoming train
Who's smoke is just a haze of my everyday life that I strive to stabilize as sane

Feeble - Unable to cope
Faint - Unable to hope
Low - Withering in the weariest of woes
Imperfect - To say the least, just so you know

Meek - Consider me dead or consider me weak
Crude - Consider me a wreck or consider me rude
Sickly - To bear such barren of a brain that's nothing short of grisly
Stale - Slit the sails and sever the voyage on the verge to fail

Tonight's the night that my weakness prevails