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The Rules of The Mole People

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The Rules of The Mole People

Post  Owen on Mon May 21, 2012 8:02 pm

Welcome to the Underground Mole People Nation

Our MoleKing is Martyn/heartless.bambi... Owen, however... was given the title of the Mole People's Drag Queen... To which he takes alittle too seriously...

To join the Nation you must first sacrifice Joakim, and one must always wear their very own banana costume whilst performing the ritualistic sacrifical of Joakim.

(Do not fret, Joakim respawns... eventually, Please do not forget to hide his corpse to make his respawn slower, due to he has to find his body first to do so)

During every celebration... we must sacrifice Joakim... and wear our cloaks, Owen must wear a pretty dress and Martyn a MoleTux made from the finiest Joa-skins...

When it is Sunny, we must sacrifice Joakim, and pray to Martyn that he makes it cloudy again.

Before eating, we must sacrifice Joakim, then hide the corpse before we eat and drink and be merry!

When it is cloudy, we must thank Martyn the Mole King for making it so, this is usually done via sacrifing Joakim...

If you wish to gain a Mole Husband, remember, they love your furry backs and hands so do not shave them!... from experience I have found that sacrificing a Mr Joakim usually does the trick also...

If you wish to gain a Mole Bride, wear your finiest cloak made from Joa-skins, gel back your furry whiskers, bend down on one knee with a ring in your right hand, take a deep breathe, stare deep into her eyes, and then stab Joakim with the traditional banana-handled-mole-knife with your left hand (NEVER the other way around!)... and that is how you get the Mo-ladies... They can not resist a good left handed stabbing of the Joakim with the traditional banana-mole-knife... for good measure do this by the dusty plains at 5.27am...


Please visit our Library, firing range, gold statue of Mole King Martyn, dusty plains, swamp, shopping center, cinema or the school... of course... all being in our underground Kingdom...

Live long and please do not forget to sacrifice Joakim... we do not do that nearly enough...

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Re: The Rules of The Mole People

Post  Joakim on Mon May 21, 2012 8:12 pm

I'm speechless... I mean...




I'm honored.
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Re: The Rules of The Mole People

Post  VioletQaia on Mon May 21, 2012 9:30 pm

Oh goodness!! This is pretty epic haha. Poor Joakim!!

Don't worry, if I'm forced to sacrifice you in order to join, I'll hide your body somewhere really easy to locate *coughmytreefortcough* erm, I mean, All Hail the MoleKing and the Mole People's Drag Queen, Martin and Owen!! Very Happy
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Re: The Rules of The Mole People

Post  Heartless.Bambi on Mon May 21, 2012 11:36 pm

Liking these rules, it"s a great start. May need more sacrifices though, will contribute after work.
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Re: The Rules of The Mole People

Post  Heartless.Bambi on Mon May 21, 2012 11:38 pm

Also, overcast weather for all, you guys (or moles?) deserve it =D
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Re: The Rules of The Mole People

Post  Owen on Tue May 29, 2012 11:51 am

Just tagged Joakim so he is known by all of Mole-dom that he is Martyn's bit.. *cough cough cough*.... Martyn's "sacrifice" Wink


pandalol

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Re: The Rules of The Mole People

Post  Heartless.Bambi on Tue May 29, 2012 5:39 pm

Mhmm, that's right, my "sacrifice" Wink
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Re: The Rules of The Mole People

Post  Joakim on Tue May 29, 2012 8:44 pm

Yay I got tags!

This deserves a dancing, drunk panda wearing a diaper pandalol
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