The Rules of The Mole People

[Owen]

Welcome to the Underground Mole People Nation

Our MoleKing is Martyn/heartless.bambi... Owen, however... was given the title of the Mole People's Drag Queen... To which he takes alittle too seriously...

To join the Nation you must first sacrifice Joakim, and one must always wear their very own banana costume whilst performing the ritualistic sacrifical of Joakim.

(Do not fret, Joakim respawns... eventually, Please do not forget to hide his corpse to make his respawn slower, due to he has to find his body first to do so)

During every celebration... we must sacrifice Joakim... and wear our cloaks, Owen must wear a pretty dress and Martyn a MoleTux made from the finiest Joa-skins...

When it is Sunny, we must sacrifice Joakim, and pray to Martyn that he makes it cloudy again.

Before eating, we must sacrifice Joakim, then hide the corpse before we eat and drink and be merry!

When it is cloudy, we must thank Martyn the Mole King for making it so, this is usually done via sacrifing Joakim...

If you wish to gain a Mole Husband, remember, they love your furry backs and hands so do not shave them!... from experience I have found that sacrificing a Mr Joakim usually does the trick also...

If you wish to gain a Mole Bride, wear your finiest cloak made from Joa-skins, gel back your furry whiskers, bend down on one knee with a ring in your right hand, take a deep breathe, stare deep into her eyes, and then stab Joakim with the traditional banana-handled-mole-knife with your left hand (NEVER the other way around!)... and that is how you get the Mo-ladies... They can not resist a good left handed stabbing of the Joakim with the traditional banana-mole-knife... for good measure do this by the dusty plains at 5.27am...


Please visit our Library, firing range, gold statue of Mole King Martyn, dusty plains, swamp, shopping center, cinema or the school... of course... all being in our underground Kingdom...

Live long and please do not forget to sacrifice Joakim... we do not do that nearly enough...

[Joakim]

I'm speechless... I mean...




I'm honored.

[VioletQaia]

Oh goodness!! This is pretty epic haha. Poor Joakim!!

Don't worry, if I'm forced to sacrifice you in order to join, I'll hide your body somewhere really easy to locate *coughmytreefortcough* erm, I mean, All Hail the MoleKing and the Mole People's Drag Queen, Martin and Owen!!

[Heartless.Bambi]

Liking these rules, it"s a great start. May need more sacrifices though, will contribute after work.

[Heartless.Bambi]

Also, overcast weather for all, you guys (or moles?) deserve it =D

[Owen]

Just tagged Joakim so he is known by all of Mole-dom that he is Martyn's bit.. *cough cough cough*.... Martyn's "sacrifice"

[Heartless.Bambi]

Mhmm, that's right, my "sacrifice"

[Joakim]

Yay I got tags!

This deserves a dancing, drunk panda wearing a diaper

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