The Domino Effect

[Nepenthe]

An old poem, posted on the first forum...


Inevitable speculations
This world comes spiraling down
Ideas are cluttered in this horrid mind
Black white, right and wrong
Appalling thoughts that thrive inside

And all it takes is one
Just one misconception that leads to frustration
Just one simple thought to send the symptoms flying
Just one bout of anger to turn on myself
Just one act of defiance and then I'll give up trying

Since what's the use?
Aspiration leads to self abuse
So I'll abandon it from this wretched mind
The longest road, a suicide ride
Such absurdity my life reflects
Yet it only turns into a domino effect

Because all it takes is once
Just one simple saying to put me in my place
Just one silent smirk to break ruin to my life
Just one bout of anger then sadness coincides
Just one strange stare to stricken thoughts of suicide

What's the use?
This life of lies is so untrue
Broken bits and pieces, shattered remnants
Behind a veil of sanity I hide
There's no going back from this suicide ride
It's the happiness my life rejects
So I'll wait until the next domino effect

Since all it takes is once
Just one speculation that lends to depression
Just one deranged thought to push me through the wall
Just one tempting trigger to turn on myself
Nothing even mattered to me at all

So I give you the freedom
Call me what you want
But I can dance upon the fire
I can walk upon the razor
Hey, can you?
Holier than thou with your plastic thoughts of advice
Fuck off for now, you don't know the dread I hide

Wear the domino, mask the reject
Still it hardly rejects the effect
Still it's a power that never gets respect
No, it never gets respect